You Are Not Dead Yet

It is every sensible girls dream to further their education and go on to college or university after high school. This was my dream. Imagine the disappointment; after getting my results and with all the choices of programmes I would apply for in mind, the harsh reality that the financial situation at home at that time did not permit for me to go to university kicked in.

I was hurting. The numerous phone calls and updates from friends and former school mates made it even worse. Fortunately the heavens smiled on me or the ancestors perhaps as my parents were moved to another city. This eased a lot of pressure on me as I became far from my peers thus not have to see them often.

I wallowed in my sorrow. I remember having to cry myself to sleep for many nights. Many times I would want to call or chat with my friends but they would tell me they are studying or in a lecture. That however taught me a valuable lesson. I learnt that sometimes we really do not have time for certain things or certain things are not as important hence focus on the important is crucial. I figured if one of my friends had to take my calls during a lecture it could have cost them a great part of their life.

I felt stuck and so much a failure because I had my goals set and at that moment the only thing I wanted was to be at college. My whole life, my success, my happiness and that of my parents all depended on that. It is true ‘‘no one can destroy your dream, unless you let them” otherwise you destroy it yourself. I saw the light though, and this I know will get me a decent portion of critics but education to me has never been a guarantee of success.

I am sure all the graduates in Zimbabwe can confirm how their education has accounted for nothing in their lives. The simple reason being most people simply give up. Life as we know it was never meant to be easy – it’s a constant struggle, with extreme lows and a fair share of its highs. The times when it’s most important to persevere are the same times one is constantly tested. It sure felt like the end of the world. I ask myself now; was it ever real then, the way I felt about the whole situation or simple peer pressure?

One day my mother got into my room and she found her little girl drenched in tears. She hugged me and told me the one good thing ”YOU ARE NOT DEAD YET” even though it feels like the end.

I slept on those words and woke up a different lady.  I had to accept the harsh reality that I could not go to university at that particular time. I realised I still had the opportunity to make it in life, have dreams come true while making my parents happy at the same time. I am challenged by Gayton Mckenzie’s story. Despite dusty matric results and a criminal record to his name, the South African wrote a best seller which has sold millions, became one of South Africa’s most sought motivational speakers and now owns a company enlisted on not just one but two stock exchanges. Now how is that for an ex-con who realised he could still pursue his dreams even though the future looked bleak.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
– Alexander Graham Bell.

I decided my focus should not only be on going to university. I got time to do things that I greatly love that is dancing and writing. I wrote so much poetry those days and got to be a dance instructor (choreographer) for the kids from my church. I would get accessories for resell in Harare to Bulawayo for that extra cash. It sounds cliché but I knew what I wanted and I was determined to achieve it.

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all. An orphaned girl, Maud Chifamba (14) quickly comes to mind. She is the youngest person to ever get enrolled at a tertiary institution. Despite the situation she was in and her background, she defied all the odds.  She will always be talked about decades to come.

As I said before, life was never meant to be a romantic walk in the park. That unplanned pregnancy, failed exams, contract termination among other circumstances are all setbacks that will only disturb all preconceived plans but note I said ”disturb.”  It really does not matter, wear that pain like stilettos if you are a lady and like your favourite pair of sneakers for the fellas. At the end of the day life goes on and as long you hold on dreams will be fulfilled.

Work hard! Never get tired to fight for what you want and what you believe in. Be strong and courageous and know that you can do anything you put your mind to. The only way to deal with pain is feeling it. People will always try to bring you down. It is how you respond to the falling down that defines your pathway to success. Many say lemonade is overrated but when life hands you lemons, whatever you want to do with them is solely your decision.

So yes it did not work out the way you wanted it to, it seems it is taking forever or delaying, there is no reason to throw in the towel YOU ARE NOT DEAD YET! As long you still breathing you still can





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